[Lyrics for Deirdre Flint – The Boob Fairy]
When I was in my teenage years, I did just what I should
I listened to my mother and I was kind and sweet and good
And my friends and I did rituals and I prayed with all my might
That this would be the evening that she’d stop along her flight
Well, that was several years ago and that chick’s long overdue
And it’s time I came to terms with something plainly clear to you.
The boob fairy never came for me
No, the boob fairy never came for me
Okay, I’m spunky and I’m cute and I’ve got a great personality
But the boob fairy never came for me
Well, we were the third house on a country drive, I thought
Maybe she just got lost, so I hung my bra on the mailbox
Til the neighbors took it off
And all my friends got visits and expanded through the years
And left me wailing to the gods buying training bras at Sears
Still I harbor hopes, she’ll come for me, I know she will
I’d get ’em done myself if she’d agree to fit the bill
The boob fairy never came for me
No the boob fairy never came for me
Look, I wasn’t wanting melons, just a cute curvaceous “B”
But the boob fairy never came for me.
The boob fairy never came for me
No the boob fairy never came for me
Though the hip fairy came two times
And the thigh fairy came three
The boob fairy never came for me.