Im just a regular everyday normal guy
Nothing special about me motherfcker
Im just a regular everyday normal guy
When I go to the clubs I wait in line motherfcker
Im just a regular everyday normal guy
I got 600 dollars in the bank motherfcker
Im just a regular everyday normal guy
And my sexual perfomances are average
I work at customer service at a phone company
I make 12 bucks an hour but thats all I need
I live in a small apartment on a quiet street
I dont go out much, I like to watch TV
I cant afford a car, I use public transportation
I dont mind, I read till I reach my destination
Sometimes a newspaper, sometimes a book
And Im not very good with the women
Im a pretty sharp person and Im average looking
Last time I had sex was in 2003
And Im ashamed to admit it, but it wasnt free
Im just a regular everyday normal guy
I get nervous in social situations motherfcker
Im just a regular everyday normal guy
I get constipated once a month motherfcker
Im just a regular everyday normal guy
And I make pretty good spaghetti sauce motherfcker
Im just a regular everyday normal guy
And I get scared when I go see the dentist
Im the Pauly Shore of everyday life
Easily forgettable, and Im not very liked
I have an According to Jim personality
Im as entertaining as a fcking STD
If you want to mess with me, I think you probably can
Because Im not confident, and Im weak for a man
Ill just roll up in a ball when you kick me in the back
Yeah honestly, I probably wont fight back
And I dont have many friends that would back me up
My friend Steve would, but he doesnt look very tough
You want some of this, bitch?
If you rarely get laid put your hands up
If youre not well paid put your hands up
If you got a pet cat put your hands up
And if you have a bad back put your hands up
I hurt my back two summers ago moving a fridge, and ever since then, its just not the same… you know it… it gets.. it gets pretty sore
I am just a regular everyday normal guy
My parents are really nice people moterfcker
I am just a regular everyday normal guy
I am somewhat afraid of heights motherfcker
I am just a regular everyday normal guy
I like the show Greys Anatomy motherfcker
I am just a regular everyday normal guy
And I am pretty good at making paper planes