I take too long to answer telephones
I take too long to type my name and record messages
But my handwriting is excellent
In fact, its second to none, none
I just got in from somewhere really good
They offered me the part of Bono and a speaking role
With all the merchandise and sunglasses
I could ever need, need
I drive round cities in a chariot
I get preferential treatment at the Marriott
But if the truth be told
Im naked under all these clothes
I tell you what it is on my mind
I only want to be in your record collection, whoa
I only want to be in your record collection, whoa
And Ill do anything it takes just to get there
My brain is buzzing and the room is strange
Like the scene in Trading Places at the stock exchange
I made a million overnight in 87
Now Im living in my parking space, parking space
My teeth are bright and my hair is clean
I wear Paco Rabanne like I was Charlie Sheen
But in the rain we all look wet
And in the snow we all look cold
I tell you what it is on my mind
I only want to be in your record collection, whoa
I only want to be in your record collection, whoa
And Ill do anything it takes just to get there
Disgusted by all the flashness
I think Im a don, they think Im an actor, but I catch this
My two needs are pillow and a mattress
Once I can fill up the space with a famous actress
Give me a mil, Ill do a DJ set
I pull spikey with the greet like a cactus
Show off, egos high
You cant match this chauvinistic pig, money man tactics
Im not as clever as I thought I was
It got pointed out to me as I was tying the knot
And all I want to know is
How I got so far down, down
Im not as lucky as I thought I was
My luck ran out the other day as I was crossing the road
Who would have thought a truck like that
Could have caused so much?
I tell you what it is on my mind
I only want to be in your record collection, whoa
I only want to be in your record collection, whoa
And Ill do anything it takes just to get there