I got a dog in this fight I got troops on the ground
His name is old Spayed Kooley hes the meanest dog in town
If you think Im foolin try bustin in through the door
Hell tear you a whole brand new one and you wont come back no more
Spayeds a good dog hes really bad
Hes the best pal this poor boy ever had
Now Spayed might get suspicious when first you chance to meet
So if you come a callin you better wipe your feet
Empty out your pockets let him see your hands
Be sure to talk good English so he can understand
Spayed likes mariachis he loves to hear em croon
I know helI be watchin if the fiddles aint in tune
When you come round to our table you better play it sweet
Or its adios muchachos down on Olivera Street
Spayeds a good dog hes really fine
So if you want to be a friend of mine
Pledge allegiance to our flag try to sing on key
And you wont have no problem with my dog Spayed Kooley