Narrator And nows it time for Obscure Broadway Show Tunes with Larry. The part of the show where Larry comes out and sings an obscure Broadway show tune. Without further ado, from the unknown musical Office Supplies, the heart-rending love song, Where Have All the Staplers Gone?
Larry We dont have much time before the big meeting.
Petunia No. No, we dont.
Larry Have you seen the scissors, miss?
Petunia Theyre in the bottom drawer
Larry I tried that drawer but theyre there no more
Petunia Thats odd
Larry I know I thought for sure
Petunia Have you seen the masking tape?
Larry Its right next to the phone
Petunia Thats what I thought but nows it not
I guess I should have known
Together Ohhhh…Where have all the staplers gone?
What happened to our paper clips?
Petunia The ballpoint pens are gone again
Larry Theyre gone again
Together The stick-it pads have lost their stick
Do you remember when…
Larry The rubber bands were in their place?
Petunia Theyre in the middle drawer
Rubber Bands Middle drawer, middle drawer
Larry Light bulbs easy to replace
Petunia Yes!
Larry There were always more
Petunia Reams of paper raining down
Paper Raining, raining down
Together Legal pads a plenty
Legal Pads Were legal
Petunia Highlighters in every hue
Larry I remember!
Together Never less than twenty
Ohhhh…Where have all the staplers gone?
What happened to our paper clips?
Larry The ballpoint pens are gone again
Petunia Theyre gone again
Together Weve run out of packing slips
Petunia Someday my prints will come
Larry Please replace the toner
Petunia Someday well find more of
Larry Our manila folders
Petunia Someday my prints will come
Larry Wheres the printer cable?
Petunia Someday well find more of
Together Adhesive shipping labels
Ohhhh…Where have all the staplers gone?
What happened to our paper clips?
Paper ClipsStaplers Paper clips
Larry The ballpoints are gone again
Petunia Theyre gone again
Together The Sharpies all have flattened tips
Where have all the staplers gone?
Narrator This has been Obscure Broadway Show Tunes with Larry. Tune in for act two Revenge of the Staplers.